Control
by Battus philenor
Summary: GS Both Grissom and Sara try to get control over their feelings


Title: Control  
  
Author: Battus philenor  
  
Disclaimer: I have no claim to anything CSI. I get nothing from this but happiness from taking the G/S ship farther than those who do own CSI.  
  
He slid the key into the lock of his front door and slipped into his still dark town house. His hand reached out on instinct for the switch that would throw some light into his living room. He made his way to the kitchen while admiring his newly installed slate floor. Flooring was not something he would normally splurge on; he just loved the look and thought the cold grey would only enhance his various displays of vibrantly colored butterflies. They were the only splash of color in his home, and he thought that made them more beautiful.  
  
Reaching his intended destination he opened the refrigerator door in search of something, he didn't know what yet. Spying the oddly shaped Granny Smith apple he reached into the clear drawer and pulled out his breakfast. Actually he preferred to think of this as his midnight snack. It was right before his bedtime after all, even if he knew he wouldn't be able to sleep today.  
  
He knew that the happenings of his just completed shift would be mercilessly replaying through his mind not allowing him any rest. It seemed that one part of her body or another was directly in front of his face all evening. Who other than Sara Sidle could upset his routine so routinely? He happened to stroll by the lab and she as she was bending over a microscope with her shapely ass seductively calling to him. He walked into the break room just as she bent down to pick up a napkin she had dropped; her slightly low cut shirt dipping even lower. He had the most perfect view of her apparently cold breasts. He could see her hard nipples jutting through the fabric of her bra. That woman was maddening, and he wasn't sure what, if anything he should do about it. He knew what he wanted to do, but that of course was the problem. Well, that wasn't exactly a problem; it was the fact that he shouldn't pursue her that was the predicament.  
  
He wanted to pull her into his arms and ravage her, make her quiver and convulse under his touches, make her scream his name as he brought her to orgasm over and over again.  
  
No, there would definitely be no sleep for Gil Grissom today. There would be some self gratification; which had become an inescapable daily habit for him recently. It was a physical release, but it did not relieve the build up happening within his mind. He would immediately get that anxious feeling again. If this kept up, he would have calluses on his hand. Maybe he could learn to be ambidextrous, but then of course at the rate he had been going, he would have two callused hands. He might as well be sixteen again. This whole situation was ridiculously out of control. He needed to speak with her because his current plan of avoiding her was not working. With his decision made to talk to Sara, he headed toward the bathroom and a much needed shower.  
  
He stripped down to nothing while the water warmed up. He stepped into the hot spray and couldn't help imagining that Sara was the warmth surrounding his body. His erection was suddenly throbbing in his hand; which he was imaging was Sara's mouth. He slowly stroked his own rigid flesh as he pictured her lips slipping down around his shaft as her tongue flicked back and forth over the head of his member. His seed shot out onto the shower wall as he thought of Sara's eyes lovingly looking up at him as she swallowed his offering. As her name escaped from between his lips he knew he needed to speak with her, soon. The time had finally come where he would say to hell with perceptions and to hell with his own stupid hang ups. He had to have her. This was no longer a mild distraction, he was in love. He had christened every room in his house with his imaginary Sara. He was pathetic. He now needed the real thing. Gil Grissom was in love with Sara Sidle, and he had no choice but to tell her.  
  
_______________________________  
  
She was still flustered from the night's events as she climbed the stairs to her apartment. It took Sara way too long to locate the key to her door which was in a mostly empty purse. She had caught Grissom staring at her at various times throughout the shift and it put her whole body on alert. She was beginning to believe that when your body was stimulated, your brain turned to mush. She became just plain stupid around him. Considering most of the time here recently he totally ignored her, it was ridiculous. She noticed more and more though that he would watch her when he thought she couldn't see him.  
  
Of course she took full advantage of knowing he was watching her. She used the opportunity to try and tempt him a little. She would lean over something too far so he would be able to see down her shirt. Or she would bend over in front of him so he had an excellent view of her ass. She could have sworn she heard him moan when she did that last night. Thinking back though it was probably just wishful thinking, but a girl could dream. And dream she would; all day about him again, of that she was certain.  
  
Her dreams had been so vivid of late, and she couldn't remember ever having sex dreams that went quite so far. Most of them included a very dominate Grissom taking her anywhere and everywhere without hesitation. She chalked that up to her need for him to be anything but the passive weenie that he had been over the last 10 years or so. He would bend her over the back of the couch, or throw her down on the kitchen table, or hold her up against the shower wall with her legs wrapped around his waist.  
  
All scenarios leaving her to wake up so close to orgasm that she had to finish the job, alone in her cold bed, thinking of him. While somewhat satisfying, at least momentarily, it always left her with an excessive emptiness that she thought could never be filled.  
  
Even though his recent leering had given her a glimmer of hope, she knew better than to think that this attention would be anything other than fleeting. He had teetered between blatant flirting and totally disregarding her too many times in the past. She was done chasing him. She would maneuver herself to make it easier for him to ogle her, but she would no longer be the pursuer. It was too easy to be hurt that way. She would be the pursued not the pursuer, even if it killed her.  
  
__________________________________  
  
Later that night, Grissom found himself wandering the halls in search of Sara. He found her without too much effort sitting on a stool and peering through a microscope. He leaned against the doorframe and just took in her lovely form.  
  
She was amazed that she could sense his presence without having to see him. She couldn't do that with anybody but him. She knew he was behind her, probably standing in the doorway too afraid to come into the same room with her. She lifted herself off the stool slowly so her movements wouldn't scare him away. Never removing her eyes from the microscope, she slid the stool out of the way and bent over at the waist.  
  
Grissom's eyes were riveted to her body as he watched her rise from the stool and bend slowly over the microscope. She grabbed her lower back with both hands and started rubbing as if her muscles were sore.  
  
He started to move towards her with the intention of rubbing her back for her, but caught himself after a few steps. He let out a small sigh before he realized it and she turned around to him without standing up and gave him a smile. God she was beautiful. She was right there in front of him in that provocative position smiling at him. It was almost too much for him to handle. He continued into the room to stand close to the table. Close enough so that she hopefully couldn't tell that he was aroused.  
  
She knew he was there all along, but when she heard him sigh, she figured she had no choice but to acknowledge his presence. Otherwise he would realize she was toying with him. When she turned her head to see him she couldn't help but smile at him. He was so damn cute when he was gawking at her. Plus she didn't want to let on that she knew what he was doing. That may scare him off and he may never look at her again. She watched him as he quickly walked to the table and thought she knew why he was in such a hurry to get there. This was too good an opportunity to pass up; she had to make him squirm a little more.  
  
"Hey Griss, you want to come take a look at his for me?" She slid just a touch out from in front of the microscope.  
  
"Sure, what do you have here?" He realized as he was moving in to look, that she was awfully close and she wasn't budging. His right arm brushed against her left arm as he leaned over to take a look. She didn't back away from the contact and neither did he.  
  
"Just some fibers from that robbery. I'm not quite sure what they are. Can you tell?" She was pleasantly surprised that he still had his arm against hers. He lifted his head up and turned towards her to speak. Their faces were only a few inches apart when he spoke. "No, I'm not sure either. Go ahead and give them to Greg. He'll have to give us a little help on this one." She could feel his breath on her face as he spoke. It made her a little weak in the knees; which made her grin. She smiled at him which was giving him some confidence.  
  
"Sara, would you"  
  
"Hey guys, what ya lookin at?" Nick drawled as he entered the room.  
  
They both immediately jumped back from each other as if they were caught in a moment of passion.  
  
"Gees Nick! Don't sneak up on people like that!"  
  
"Well, I didn't mean to scare ya Sara."  
  
Grissom just glared at the young man, angry that he had interrupted the breakfast invitation he was trying to offer. "I'll be in my office doing some paperwork." With that Grissom walked out leaving Nick and a very puzzled Sara alone.  
  
There were only a few minutes left in the shift when Sara went to find Grissom. She saw he was still in his office doing paperwork. She leaned in just watching him and waiting to see how long it would take him to notice her.  
  
He looked so hot with his glasses and beard. There was something seriously wrong with her. She wanted to run her fingers through his hair to see just how soft those curls were on the top of his head. She also wanted to know what that beard would feel like on her inner thighs. Damn she was starting to get that all too familiar feeling of falling that started in the bottom of her stomach and branched out to all areas from there.  
  
He felt her presence and looked up suddenly to see her looking at him with her face flushed and her hand on her stomach. "Sara are you ok?"  
  
"Oh, uh... yeah I just uh..."  
  
"Are you sick? Your face is flushed and you're holding your stomach." The concern was evident in his voice as he got up quickly to be by her side.  
  
She really wanted to die now. She was so aroused she could barely speak and he thought she was sick. Good God she needed to get out of there. "No, really I'm fine Grissom. I was just going to head home and thought I would just say good bye. So um, good bye then."  
  
"Ok. Are you sure, because I can drive you home if you're not feeling well. Why don't I just drive you home Sara, it would make me feel better."  
  
"No Grissom really, it's ok. I'm good."  
  
"Nope, that's it. I'm driving you home, so don't say another word." He had gotten serious all of a sudden and had that, I'm the supervisor tone.  
  
She knew she had lost. This was a horribly mortifying situation that she could not get out of, so she just gave up. "Ok Grissom you win, but you do realize you'll have to pick me up for work tonight if you take me home right?"  
  
"We'll see. You may be sick tonight." He put his hand in the small of her back starting to lead her down the hallway toward the door.  
  
"Oh God, whatever Grissom. Let me go get my jacket."  
  
The ride to Sara's apartment was quiet. Sara was too embarrassed to speak, and Grissom was to busy contemplating how to be invited in once they arrived.  
  
Sara was shocked to find that when she started to get out of the car, Grissom was also getting out, but she didn't say a word. She just kept her mouth shut, and led him up the stairs.  
  
Grissom was surprised that Sara was letting him get away with walking her upstairs. He thought for sure she would throw a fit and tell him she was a big girl. He started to feel a little apprehensive, figuring she must really be sick if she wasn't stopping him.  
  
Sara unlocked the door and entered her house with Grissom hot on her heels. He shut the door behind them and followed her into the living room. She sat down on the couch and Grissom stood a few feet away staring at her.  
  
"Sara is there anything I can do for you or get for you?"  
  
"Griss, it's my house. I should be asking you that."  
  
He grinned at that comment and sat down on the couch leaving a cushion in between them. "I know where I am Sara. I just thought since you aren't feeling well, I would try to take care of you. You know, some aspirin, water, chicken noodle soup." He grinned at her again as she gave him one of her big smiles.  
  
"Well, that's sweet of you Griss, but really I'm ok."  
  
"Well you do look better than you did earlier in my office." With that he scooted over and put the back of his hand on her forehead.  
  
Sara's heart rate immediate sped up and her breathing became shallow.  
  
"Well, you don't seem to have a fever."  
  
Grissom noticed her breathing pattern had changed and she was starting to flush again. He realized at that point that his leg was against her leg and his hand was still on her forehead. Putting all the facts together a little slowly, his own heart started pounding more loudly in his chest. He ran his hand down the side of her face turning his palm towards her skin as he went. Stopping with his hand on her neck he kept his eyes on her face for any sign that she didn't want this.  
  
"Sara, I uh, I think I'm catching what you have."  
  
She looked at him and saw the slight smile forming on his face.  
  
"Really, what is it that you think I have Griss?"  
  
He turned to face her more and brought his other hand to her head and stroked her hair.  
  
"I'm not sure yet, I would have to run some experiments to be certain."  
  
He leaned in towards her as if to kiss her. Sara met him half way with her hands automatically going to test out her own theory about the softness of his curls.  
  
He brushed her lips gently with his at first. After pulling back slightly to look into her eyes he leaned in again for a longer deeper kiss. He ran his tongue across her bottom lip as if asking for entry into her mouth. Sara granted permission and their tongues danced together. Grissom's hands traveled down her body coming to rest on her hips. He gently tugged her body pulling her onto his lap. Straddling his legs, Sara broke the kiss and went to work on his neck. Trailing kisses from one ear to the other while starting to slowly grind on him. Feeling his arousal she groaned into his neck.  
  
Hearing her groan, Grissom went to work on ridding her of her shirt. She grumbled slightly when he made her remove her hands from his hair in order to get her shirt off her. Her grumble quickly turned into another moan as he adeptly removed her bra and started squeezing her breasts.  
  
"Oh God Grissom, the experimentation is over; we need a full blown probe into this."  
  
He laughed as he picked her up with her legs wrapped around his waste and carried her into her bedroom. He gently laid her down on her bed and started removing her pants. He threw them in the corner of the room and his own pants quickly followed them.  
  
He crawled into bed with Sara and rolled her onto his body. Even if she never let him touch her again, he would never forget the feel of her lying naked on top of him.  
  
He broke their kiss and made her lay still for a moment to just stare into her eyes. Sensing her nervousness at what she thought was his hesitation, he whispered into her ear. "Sara, please make love with me?"  
  
Seeing the adoration and love in his eyes, Sara was never so moved as she was right then. She kissed him and slid up enough to be poised above his erection with the head of his member pressing against her opening. They both broke the kiss at the same time to watch each other's eyes as he entered her.  
  
It took a minute to enter her completely. He realized happily that it had probably been as long for her as it had been for him. They started off at a slow rhythm, getting a feel for each other's bodies, neither wanting to rush the sensation of being together for the first time.  
  
With his arms wrapped tightly around her waist, he rolled them over so he could be on top. He lifted himself up with his arms as they both started to increase the pace somewhat.  
  
He took the opportunity to adore her upper body. The length of her neck, the slope of her shoulders, the way her breasts moved in time with his thrusts, and the flatness of her stomach.  
  
He silently prayed that there would be a next time so he would get the chance to examine her lower half in the same intimate way. Both were starting to lose their fascination with the slow pace.  
  
He lifted himself up even further as she wrapped her legs around his back. He started thrusting into her with everything that he had and she was meeting every thrust with her rising hips.  
  
She was dragging her nails up and down the sides of his arms leaving slight red marks, but neither of them noticed. Holding himself up with one hand he reached his other one down in between them to try to push her over the edge.  
  
He knew he couldn't hold on much longer at this pace and he was almost done going through this years Cubs' stats as a distraction.  
  
As soon as he touched her clit she was screaming his name and whipping her head back and forth on the pillow. Her whole body started to shake and he could feel her muscles gripping him deep inside her. He held on until her orgasm was over and then he let himself go with one more thrust and held himself as deeply as he could inside of her. He looked down into her eyes as his member deflated inside of her.  
  
"Sara, I didn't need this experiment to know what was wrong with me."  
  
She just stared at him, not sure what he was thinking at this moment.  
  
"I love you." With that he collapsed onto her and just held her.  
  
"You were right then, we do have the same thing Griss."  
  
End  
  
Battus philenor 


End file.
